Thursday, July 7, 2011

Change.

When I buy things, I almost ALWAYS give exact change. I don't understand why people are too lazy to take coins out of their wallet rather than putting even more in.

A while back I was at a taco bell. As always I gave the lady exact change. As she took the coins off the counter she gave me the dirtiest look. Like the look you would give a total nerd. Listen here chick, I just made your job a whole lot easier because you don't have to put your newly glued claws into that register to pull out a thing. I apologize that the register tells you how many quarters, dimes, nickles and pennys you give back for change, but doesn't tell you how to count to make sure its EXACTLY 17 cents instead. I can assure you its 17. You told me the price, I gave you the money.

Who knew that a dime, a nickle and two pennys could make someone so mad!

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Time.

It is difficult to balance my time between me, cheer, friends and boyfriend.

Cheer camp just got over with and I'm glad for that. It was fun when I wasn't annoyed or tired though. I'm bummed that I didn't make the All-American Squad, but I already have enough on my plate and I've already been to London(: . Not sure when actual practices will start. Hopefully not soon because I'm really enjoying my summer.

Then for the rest of my free time. I haven't really spent time with my friends lately. Most of my time is spent with Anthony. And it's hard because I feel bad when I spend more time with him than my friends. I feel like they think I'm just pushing them off to the side, and I'm not trying to intentionally. I'm trying to spend the most time I can with Anthony before he leaves for UC Davis. Is it so wrong to have found someone that brightens every moment that you want to make the most of the time you have together? It's not that I don't miss them. Then they accuse me of pushing them to the side. I apologize for having bad cell phone service...Thank Dad for that one.

Well I'm cutting this one short, have a lot of things to take care of.

Why is it so hard to balance time so everyone is happy?

Friday, May 20, 2011

Every 15 Minutes.

My experience in the Every 15 Minutes program was overwhelming. I've been waiting to participate since 2009. Then this year when I had the opportunity, I went for it. I support everything the program stands for and I wanted to be a part in it to show people what I believe in and what is the smart thing to do.

At first I only wanted to be the Walking Dead. I did not want to be in the accident because I didn't think I was that great of an actress to do it. When you're the walking dead, you either get a visit, or a call home saying to your parents that you are dead. when I told my dad about that, he wasn't happy. The last thing he wanted was getting another call saying that his last child left, is dead. So I told Mr. Coates ( the head guy ) that unless I could put down another number to call, I couldn't do it. Being a past student of his, I knew he wanted me involved. So he offered the Idea of being the 911 caller in the accident, because being the caller means that you are still alive and with out a scratch, and with out a call home. I wanted to be in the program so I gladly took whatever I could get to participate. Its not that I didn't want to be the caller, I just didn't think I could pull it off.

So I set up a date with a lady from the dispatch to make the call. I made the call during spring break AT the school. I parked right where I knew the accident was going to be. After the call the lady said that I should win an Academy award because it was the best call that they have heard so far. So I was pretty confident that I did a great job acting. Coates also wanted me to help with makeup for the walking dead and the victims. So May 19th came along and I was more than ready. I stayed in Coates's class up until third doing walking dead, the fourth and lunch doing the victims. The only emotion I had felt up to that point was excitement. Waiting so long, and it FINALLY being here.

The bell to go to fifth period finally came. We waited until the late bell rang to go to the cars. As we rush out, I start getting more and more anxious to get on with everything. Then we see the cars. No biggie. just one smashed car and one okay car straight from the junk yard. What started to hit me is when Katie, Crysta, Danielle and Patricia hopped in to the car. Something about seeing people I know and are my friends in a car that messed up with bruises and cuts all over them made my stomach flip. As more people showed up I had a terrified look on my face as I got the occasional "good luck!" or "you'll do great!". Gary (you all know Gary! the medic guy!) told me that he would give me a signal when to run to the cars. The sound people would play the call once I reached for my phone. But NO. they started it with no signal. So I looked at Gary and he said go so I ran over and did the rest of the call. And thats when it got real for me. Looking at Katie & Patricia during the call is when it made everything real. I didn't know what to do. I paced until my call ended then ran over to Crysta's side to open their door. Looking at them was so difficult. Even though I saw all of their bruises be put on and blood drizzled on them, it was too real to me. Then I see Travis lying on the road. I was confused. I knew he was alive, but he was supposed to be dead. And watching Danielle and Patricia trapped in the car saying "what happened? Whats going on? I can't feel my legs!" made it all the more real. I stayed by them the best I could until help arrived. When we all got too emotional, Gary pulled us out and calmed us down. I was so over whelmed I almost had an asthma attack. Ive never been so shaken up in my life. The reality, vs. what I saw was pushed out of the way. I was at a point where I wanted to hurt George. I was trying to find him but they had already taken him away. And knowing that every one is okay, in no danger, not in pain, just waiting left my mind. Seeing Travis on the ground, watching them put the tarp on him, then the blanket and in to the Hurst made me seriously believe he was dead. I wanted him to pop up and say "I'm alive! Its okay!" in some weird accent like he does. Also seeing Patricia and Danielle being pulled out of the car was painful to watch. Even though we all knew their fate, I kept yelling "You will be okay! They are taking care of you! It will be okay!". Of course they would be okay! I would see them later that night! But I still wanted to hop in the ambulance with them to be by their side.

After they took George, Danielle, Patricia and Travis to where they needed to go, it was just the four of us "scene setters left". Crying, bloody, and confused, Coates pulled us off. As we walked awkwardly off the scene, Sam looks back at us with a smile and says something like "great job! we did great!". For a second I had no idea what she was talking about. Then I took a second to think, wait, its over, the accident was over. We were done. We could stop being sad and shaken up and the flipped stomach feeling could go away! No. It didn't. We walked back to Coates's class room and got our shower gear then headed to the locker rooms. On the way there, almost every person we passed said "GREAT job acting out there!!!" and each time we said right back, "Thanks! But it wasn't acting."

The showers were straight from hell. they were steaming hot. try that after being all sweaty from panicking in the sun. After we showered the best we could we headed to the Nazarene to meet up with the rest of our school, Oroville, & Prospect. Thats where we did team building exercises. I didn't participate because my stomach was still in a million knots. Gary got me some peppermint to soothe my stomach. Such a good guy. During dinner, most of the people from the crash sat together and just talked about it all. Seeing each other again made us all teary. We heard Danielle and Patricia talk about going to the hospital and Travis going to the morgue. We headed to the Gymnastics Academy after dinner to play around for a bit. There we vented, listened, cried ourselves dry, and gave and took support. For the last month or two I've felt alone. Sorta like I had no one to turn to. But at the retreat, I felt supported and loved. And thats what I needed especially after a difficult day like that.

Going back to school was tough. Going back to the "crash" was oddly painful. I took couple pictures and took a picked up a piece of glass to keep as a reminder of that day. Driving on it, near it, walking by or near it is just o hard because of what happened there, even though it wasn't real.

At the rally, watching the video of the accident killed me. Hearing my voice then seeing me calling 911, looking at all the people in the cars made me cry. the whole video was tough for everyone. I'm so happy and satisfied that this program has reached out to so many people. I think that everyone needs to know that it could happen to anyone. Could be a family member, a friend, a boy friend or girl friend, or even you.

This is the best picture I could get of the scene the next day.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The most random things.

Lately my sleep schedule has been terrible! Never enough, but when the time comes, I'm not tired! It is so irritating! Maybe the boyfriend is to blame? Talking on Skype till one am, probably (; . But he is 100% worth the lost sleep. But it isn't just him. It's a bit of stress that I've got on my shoulders as well. From Chemistry, Prom, Every 15 Minutes, Getting all grades up, Drama, Family and Friends...its just all building up. Prom is over with, thankfully. Then next up Chemistry. Then on to Every 15 minutes!!!!! Months of anticipation to finally get to the day, ahh its almost here (: . And I get to make bruises and cuts on the victims! I'm also the 911 caller. I made the call during spring break. The lady I made the call to said that I should get an Academy Award because I did the best call they've heard all year. Guess all the practice paid off! Today we practiced doing cuts and bruises. Last time to practice before the accident. I'm so excited. I can't wait to see the looks on my classmates faces thinking " that could be me". because it could! Its just that east to hop into a car with your drunk friends and get messed up. I really want this to make an impact on kids to influence them to do the right thing.

Another thing that has been bugging me lately is being cursed at or talked badly about when I walk through the quad. Its getting old. People think that they know my side of the story, and they don't. but of course, they want drama, so they do whatever they can to stop it. I was a freshman once, I've been there, but I grew up. I used to be in link crew because I thought that freshmen need people to look up to and people they can turn to for help. but As I get more and more through high school, the freshmen get less and less mature. So if I don't have enough respect for a lot of them anymore, and if I don't have respect for them, why should I be there for them. I understand that I made a mistake, but everyone makes mistakes and I don't hold theirs against them.

Im so excited to be getting my life back on track. New guy, No Coffee Obsession, New friends, CLEAN room. just everything seems to be going well! And I cant wait to see what the future brings.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

4/19/11 (:

Lately, life has been BUSY! Being sick from allergies, school work, getting ready for the cheer season, or just trying to make new friends. BUT Im SO happy its spring break (:. My spring break started a while ago actually. Last week I didnt go to school monday because of my allergies, Tuesday I missed 2nd, Wednesday & Thursday I missed 1st and 2nd, and Friday I missed the whole day to go to chico state for chemistry day!
So far my spring break is alright. The beginning was fun. Went bowling with Israel and some others then went to sonic and a movie with miss megan (:. Then (just my luck) followed by head aches and coughing. Still suffering from coughing, but the headaches are gone! Yay!
But yeah this is my first blog in FOREVER so its going to be a little short (:

Saturday, July 10, 2010

First Post!!

So, This is my first post! yay? haha. Right now I am watching Sabrina The Teenage Witch. That show is very...cheesy. Almost everything is predictable. I am attempting to pack for my trip to Europe on the 26th. I am super excited for that (:! It's going to be hard because I always overpack. And i know im going to forget something xD. I think my body is SOOOO ready for Europe because I been getting to sleep very late lately and I checked to see what the time change would be, and the time i was falling asleey in their time was about 10:30. haha. I am so excited to leave this country!

This summer is going by so quickly! First camp. Then cheer camp and practice. and i have cheer practice every tuesday, wednesday, and thursday for the rest of the summer.I cannot wait untill we get our uniforms! i want to try mine on so badly!!!

man i wish this thing had spell check!!